my list.

while browsing thru a small pile of secrets on my favorite internet hangout site I came across something so inspired it deserved a blog. (*Cough*facebook PS group *cough*)
"You always write down what you need to do and never what you've done. You've got it backwards."
At this point in my life it seems like a never ending to do list. as that list grows so does my feeling of inadequacey. It is difficult to get a bachelor degree job in a small town and so i feel as if I am a loser who cant do anything but I forget everything that I have done that should keep me going on these days.

I have survived the odds. Some real ones, some imposed upon me because of rules society has created.
I was raised in a single parent family. Wit ha drug addicted alcohol father. I maintained a 3.0 avg throughout school in a single parent home. apparently thats hard with only one parent?
While going through one of the roughest periods in a growing childs life (middle school) I was sexually assaulted on a daily basis by a group of boys. I didnt drop out of school. I kept going. everyday. eventually making to the safety of high school where i became a beautiful dancer until I got hurt.
A tragic injury that would end my passion. I was in and out of doctors for years getting the pain to managble level. I was on and off crutches for over two years. On pain meds for longer and I still suffer but I never gave up. I kept smilin.
I was raped in the middle of a promising colelge career. I struggled hard. Battled horrible addiction. But i survived. And fell in love. I conquered some levels of my anxiety and became a promient student leader on campus. I mainted a 3.0 gpa while working full time. I lived in my first apartment. I got a car.
I graduated college. I have a bachelors degree. I have a wonderful boyfriend who I will spend the rest of my life with. I have danced in front of huge crowds. I have traveled. I have sopken my mind. I have done a lot and been through more. FOrget the to do list, I liked the done it list better.

Here's to burning the proverbial to do list that has been my anxious life and framing the done list. I have accomplished something in this life and what will happen, will happen in time.
I wrote a short story that was read by a TON of people.

I am someone. I have lived. To do list no more.